Probably you thought I was gone but no I am still here, only I've been so busy. I am now one and three-quarters years old and I am still the greatest in the world. But Rosie is still here and I think sometimes she thinks she's the best but she's not. Do you know how much she BARKS at everything that goes by the house? No wonder she doesn't get to go on vacation to Ohio. ALTHOUGH Mom and Dad didn't take me the last time they went to Ohio, either, and I think Grandma probably was really mad they didn't and wouldn't talk to them at all the whole time, and then she sent them home with a big fleece bone for me not for Rosie. I guess we know who THE GREATEST IN THE WORLD IS, huh?
I had a very wormy summer, with the doctor guys saying I had worms and I had to take pills for killing worms, but that was okay because the pills come in cheese. I showed Rosie how to play chase in the backyard, but then she started coming into my secret hideout in the hydrangeas, which is against the rules for everyone but me, but she kept doing it, so then I started using Secret Hideout 2, which I hadn't used since I was a baby, and Rosie was too fat to use it so I WON.
There were also lots of these acorn things in the yard lately, and Rosie started chewing them, so I started chewing them, too, but Mom won't let us bring them in the house. Then Rosie had some pooping problems that my Cathy noticed and told Mom about, and had to take medicine probably because of acorns, but it was a good thing because it meant more cheese for everyone, including me who has no pooping problems.
In sad news, Mom is still crazy: she's been digging up stuff in the backyard, but when we try to help her she's all "Don't dig in the backyard!" Whatever, crazy lady.
Aside from all that, things are pretty much normal. I make sure to clean Daddy's head and face and ears every night because he is dirty, and then I clean the lotion off Mommy's feet and hands. Rosie doesn't do much of anything because she's not that great. Well, she is good for snuggling with. I guess that's true.
This has been The Charlie Report.
Monday, October 4, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
A song coming on!
Sometimes it's hard to be a beagle
'specially when you're yelled at by your dad
He'll call you "bad dog"
When you're a good dog
Saying things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even if he's hard to understand
And if you love him
Jump right up on him
'Cause after all, he's just a dad
Stand by your dad!
Sniff all his private places
And lick all over his faces
And then chew on his sneakers
Stand by your dad!
And show that you're his favorite
By shoving Rosie off his lap
Stand by your dad!
'specially when you're yelled at by your dad
He'll call you "bad dog"
When you're a good dog
Saying things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even if he's hard to understand
And if you love him
Jump right up on him
'Cause after all, he's just a dad
Stand by your dad!
Sniff all his private places
And lick all over his faces
And then chew on his sneakers
Stand by your dad!
And show that you're his favorite
By shoving Rosie off his lap
Stand by your dad!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Water water water!
So Sunday we all got up and had some breakfest, and then Daddy left to go to my Jeff's house to ignore me, and then Mommy said "Hmmm, what's that buzzing noise?" and started looking in the bedrooms for buzzers, and then she opened the basement door and went down there and guess what it was FULL OF WATER! It rained real hard the night before and something got stopped up and there was like 8 inches of water in the whole basement and some electronic thing in the water was buzzing! So Mom called Dad and he came home and he said "Maybe I can put on rubber boots and wade over to the fuse box" and Mom was all "No. Way." Then my Jean called and said we should call the fire department so we did and then these firemen brought firetrucks to our house and came in our house and turned off the electricity so we wouldn't blow up, but I only know about this from hearing Mom and Dad talk about it because they made me and Rosie go outside the whole time and we missed all the excitement because they hate us! But I think they're sorry now because all those books and CDs and records got all yucky and ruined and made them cry, but I think they'll be okay because I'm giving them beagle therapy even though they are so mean to me and Rosie helps, too, I guess, with all that snuggling and shedding, plus we both smell like barbeque sauce from hanging out under the smoker when Dad made that barbequed pork thing that we didn't get any of. So really they should be grateful because they have two barbeque-scented dogs who didn't get electrocuted in the stupid flood.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Friday, March 5, 2010
I am so much smarter than Rosie!
Rose is very pretty and I do like to kiss her and she thinks she's so great because she goes right into her crate without crying (WHY?). But would you believe that she didn't even know how to play with toys and that she only just figured it out because I helped her? And SHE'S THREE!
Here's where she first learns to play with a toy. I had been showing her all week how it's done, but I guess she just couldn't figure it out or was afraid of ropes or SOMETHING. Maybe she was afraid of looking dumb next to me who is only ONE and has known how to play with toys ALL MY LIFE!
This is us playing with Ropey together. Who is better at it? ME!!
Here's where she first learns to play with a toy. I had been showing her all week how it's done, but I guess she just couldn't figure it out or was afraid of ropes or SOMETHING. Maybe she was afraid of looking dumb next to me who is only ONE and has known how to play with toys ALL MY LIFE!
This is us playing with Ropey together. Who is better at it? ME!!
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Latest Thrilling Videos
My Jean was complaining that I haven't posted enough pictures of ROSIE even though she can be so boring, so here are some videos for watching.
Me and Rosie and Mommy, just chillin'
Me and Rosie and Daddy, one week after Rosie came to live at my house.
Moms make the best beds.
Everyone is SO TIRED.
Me and Rosie and Mommy, just chillin'
Me and Rosie and Daddy, one week after Rosie came to live at my house.
Moms make the best beds.
Everyone is SO TIRED.
Monday, March 1, 2010
I have a sister now
A week ago Mom and Dad said "Hey Charlie, let's go for a carfride" and I said "Okay that sounds great if we're going somewhere fun" and they said "Oh it will be lots of fun all right." So we went in the car to the PetsMart, which IS fun because there are lots of treats and other dogs and people and bags of food. But instead of buying toys and treats and bags of food, Mom and Dad got ANOTHER DOG! And now she is my SISTER because she's a girl!
So my sister: when we met her, she was named Scooter and everyone called her "he" at PetsMart, which hurt her feelings because she's a girl, so Mom and Dad decided to give her a new name that was Rosie Penelope Sullivan, so now everyone knows she's a girl. Well. We went home and what do you think that Rosie did? She tried to get up on MY Charlie Chair and then act like it was all hers, so I had to fight her.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBpJGlQeocw
But then she just jumped up on the couch and acted like it was all hers and went to sleep, and then all she wanted to do was sleep sleep sleep, which was BORING. I tried to get her to play and not be boring, but then she would growl at me when I was just trying to have fun. The best thing was that my Jean and Jeff came to visit me and I guess meet Rosie, but by then I was so tired from trying to make that Rosie be fun that I was all tired out, too.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPI1LG8EXh8
And Sunday she just wanted to do more sleeping, so there was more being boring and sleeping.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtE_h4kuNCI
But finally something fun happened because my Cathy came to visit me and I guess to also meet Rosie, so she finally got up and was fun but I could tell Cathy still liked me the best. DUH. I really wasn't so sure about that Rosie at that point. But the next day, Mom and Dad went to work, and Cathy came and walked us, and guess what? We started having lots of fun and Rosie actually PLAYED with me and it was great and now I like to kiss her on her face and on top of her head.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSiPN_02G4s
So my sister: when we met her, she was named Scooter and everyone called her "he" at PetsMart, which hurt her feelings because she's a girl, so Mom and Dad decided to give her a new name that was Rosie Penelope Sullivan, so now everyone knows she's a girl. Well. We went home and what do you think that Rosie did? She tried to get up on MY Charlie Chair and then act like it was all hers, so I had to fight her.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBpJGlQeocw
But then she just jumped up on the couch and acted like it was all hers and went to sleep, and then all she wanted to do was sleep sleep sleep, which was BORING. I tried to get her to play and not be boring, but then she would growl at me when I was just trying to have fun. The best thing was that my Jean and Jeff came to visit me and I guess meet Rosie, but by then I was so tired from trying to make that Rosie be fun that I was all tired out, too.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPI1LG8EXh8
And Sunday she just wanted to do more sleeping, so there was more being boring and sleeping.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtE_h4kuNCI
But finally something fun happened because my Cathy came to visit me and I guess to also meet Rosie, so she finally got up and was fun but I could tell Cathy still liked me the best. DUH. I really wasn't so sure about that Rosie at that point. But the next day, Mom and Dad went to work, and Cathy came and walked us, and guess what? We started having lots of fun and Rosie actually PLAYED with me and it was great and now I like to kiss her on her face and on top of her head.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSiPN_02G4s
This is my new blog and it is GREAT like ME!
Jean told me I should start doing my Charlie Reports again but this time I should put them on a blog and I said OKAY JEAN I WILL DO THAT and so here is my new Charlie Report blog and it has all my old Charlie Reports too! So you should subscribe to my blog and then you will get an email every time I write a new Charlie Report which will be SO GREAT!
January 25, 2010: Important Charlie Update Video!!
...with ME, Charlie!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8d2xGZpO_E
I know how sad you all have been not knowing about my every move for so long, but now that you can see how I suffer EVERY DAY, you understand why. And I haven't even said ANYTHING about the kenneling!
Please send bones.
love,
Charlie
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8d2xGZpO_E
I know how sad you all have been not knowing about my every move for so long, but now that you can see how I suffer EVERY DAY, you understand why. And I haven't even said ANYTHING about the kenneling!
Please send bones.
love,
Charlie
September 22, 2009: Where dat Charlie Report?
Hey, I lookin' for it, too, but I been real busy, you can't even believe. First all those Sullivans, which I didn't even finish talkin about, and then it was my 8-month birthday which was totally ignored by everyone, and then I went to Ohio, and I just got all tired and needed some ME time. Or PEE time. I forget. But I promise I'll get back to telling you all about how great I am soon. Love, Charlie.
Part 2 of A Very Very Really Very Special Charlie Report for Monday, August 17, 2009...
...with me, Charlie.
So it was Thursday night and that Uncle Kevin and Aunt Monique and Eric and Meredith all came back to the house to love me or so it seemed, but it turned out they just wanted to eat food, and Uncle Kevin and Mom drove off and came back with a big box full of Chinese food for everyone except for me, and they put it on the big table in the dining room, which they made even bigger by putting a piece of wood in the middle that they called a leaf which was so obviously not a leaf because believe me i've seen plenty of leaves.
Anyway, they all sit down and start eating all that good-smelling food and having a great time while i suffer when, if you can believe it, here come a whole bunch of more STRANGERS walking up our yard and right into the house, and Dad looks all shocked like he's going to call the police but then it turns out he has ANOTHER brother and this is him, my Uncle Bob, and his fancy, Aunt Stacey, and my three cousins Andrew, Mitchell, and Colin, and it turns out it's NO COINCIDENCE and this was a secret plan all along to surprise ME because everyone wanted to meet me in person, even though Dad was acting again like it was all about him. So all the new relatives sat down and THEY all started eating delicious food without giving me any, which was pretty rude if you ask me, and then they finished all that eating and then everyone stayed up talking and laughing and stuff all the way till 11 and then Kevin and Monique and Meredith and Eric left for their hotel but Bob and Stacey and Colin and Mitchell and Drew stayed because they were going to stay in my house in the secret green room and in the basement and in my sunroom, and they all stayed up really really late laughing and talking and loving me until Mom made me go to bed around 12:30 and then she came to bed at around 1 and then Daddy came to bed later and couldn't sleep because he had hiccups that didn't go away until 3.
This has been Part 2 of A Very Very Really Very Special Charlie Report.
So it was Thursday night and that Uncle Kevin and Aunt Monique and Eric and Meredith all came back to the house to love me or so it seemed, but it turned out they just wanted to eat food, and Uncle Kevin and Mom drove off and came back with a big box full of Chinese food for everyone except for me, and they put it on the big table in the dining room, which they made even bigger by putting a piece of wood in the middle that they called a leaf which was so obviously not a leaf because believe me i've seen plenty of leaves.
Anyway, they all sit down and start eating all that good-smelling food and having a great time while i suffer when, if you can believe it, here come a whole bunch of more STRANGERS walking up our yard and right into the house, and Dad looks all shocked like he's going to call the police but then it turns out he has ANOTHER brother and this is him, my Uncle Bob, and his fancy, Aunt Stacey, and my three cousins Andrew, Mitchell, and Colin, and it turns out it's NO COINCIDENCE and this was a secret plan all along to surprise ME because everyone wanted to meet me in person, even though Dad was acting again like it was all about him. So all the new relatives sat down and THEY all started eating delicious food without giving me any, which was pretty rude if you ask me, and then they finished all that eating and then everyone stayed up talking and laughing and stuff all the way till 11 and then Kevin and Monique and Meredith and Eric left for their hotel but Bob and Stacey and Colin and Mitchell and Drew stayed because they were going to stay in my house in the secret green room and in the basement and in my sunroom, and they all stayed up really really late laughing and talking and loving me until Mom made me go to bed around 12:30 and then she came to bed at around 1 and then Daddy came to bed later and couldn't sleep because he had hiccups that didn't go away until 3.
This has been Part 2 of A Very Very Really Very Special Charlie Report.
Part 1 of A Very Very Really Very Special Charlie Report for Monday, August 17, 2009...
...with me, Charlie.
Only I'm so tired I can't even think right now, but I will say that I just had the most excitingest weekend of my whole entire life and all these people who are my relatives came to see me and love me and bring me presents for like 4 days and it was SO GREAT but then they left and it was just me and Mom and Dad and I'd be bored now except I'm SO TIRED!
But it all started last Wednesday when Mom and Dad and I were sitting in the living room after dinner and Dad was on the sofa and Mom and I were in the Charlie Chair and then these STRANGERS came walking up in our yard and right into our house except they weren't REAL stranger, they were one of my grandmas and this brother of Dad who is my Uncle Kevin and his wife my Aunt Monique and my cousins Meredith and Eric, and I never met them before except for Grandma, so I was a little nervous at first. But it turns out that they all love me AND they brought me two presents, so then I wasn't nervous and we had lots of fun and Dad was all surprised and excited because he thought it was all about him and we stayed up late and then Uncle Kevin and them all went to a hotel except Grandma stayed with us because she loves me best.
And then the next morning on Thursday, it was weird because Daddy got up before Mom, and then Uncle Kevin and them all came over and drove away with Mom in their car and I heard Mom said she was taking them to work so they could park there and then go look at boring monument things or something all day. And THEN Mom didn't come home at her regular time and I was all "hey, I gotta pee, someone better get here or else" but then Dad came home before Mom and let me out and gave me dinner, and then Mom came home with all those relatives, and then they all went back to their hotel for a while except for Grandma, who stayed with us because she loves me best. And then they all came back to our house when it was getting dark, and then all this food came from the Chinese restaurant, and everyone sat down to eat except for me because everyone is mean and doesn't let me have any. And then it got EVEN WEIRDER!
This has been Part 1 of A Very Very Really Very Special Charlie Report.
Only I'm so tired I can't even think right now, but I will say that I just had the most excitingest weekend of my whole entire life and all these people who are my relatives came to see me and love me and bring me presents for like 4 days and it was SO GREAT but then they left and it was just me and Mom and Dad and I'd be bored now except I'm SO TIRED!
But it all started last Wednesday when Mom and Dad and I were sitting in the living room after dinner and Dad was on the sofa and Mom and I were in the Charlie Chair and then these STRANGERS came walking up in our yard and right into our house except they weren't REAL stranger, they were one of my grandmas and this brother of Dad who is my Uncle Kevin and his wife my Aunt Monique and my cousins Meredith and Eric, and I never met them before except for Grandma, so I was a little nervous at first. But it turns out that they all love me AND they brought me two presents, so then I wasn't nervous and we had lots of fun and Dad was all surprised and excited because he thought it was all about him and we stayed up late and then Uncle Kevin and them all went to a hotel except Grandma stayed with us because she loves me best.
And then the next morning on Thursday, it was weird because Daddy got up before Mom, and then Uncle Kevin and them all came over and drove away with Mom in their car and I heard Mom said she was taking them to work so they could park there and then go look at boring monument things or something all day. And THEN Mom didn't come home at her regular time and I was all "hey, I gotta pee, someone better get here or else" but then Dad came home before Mom and let me out and gave me dinner, and then Mom came home with all those relatives, and then they all went back to their hotel for a while except for Grandma, who stayed with us because she loves me best. And then they all came back to our house when it was getting dark, and then all this food came from the Chinese restaurant, and everyone sat down to eat except for me because everyone is mean and doesn't let me have any. And then it got EVEN WEIRDER!
This has been Part 1 of A Very Very Really Very Special Charlie Report.
The Charlie Report for Wednesday, July 29, 2009...
...with me, Charlie.
I have to apologize for the long gap between Charlie Reports, as my support staff has not been as supportive as it could be. And so much has happened, too, that is so great and interesting and scary and everything! Maybe most important is I learned how to climb over that stupid gate Mom and Dad used to keep me in the kitchen during the day, so they had to take it down and now I get to be in the living room any time I want--ha! I heard them talking about getting a new taller gate, so I'm being very good and not making any messes in the living room so they won't do it. Well, no messes while they're at work. When they come home, it's a different story, but that's their fault for not paying attention to me ALL THE TIME, which they should be doing.
We've had lots of visitors, and they all loved me, of course. One time this Suzanne and this Tracey came to our house (supposedly they came up here to see a concert, but really it was to meet me), and they stayed in one of the secret guestrooms nobody lets me play in, and they both loved me, even though they were allergic, and I kissed them a lot and cleaned out their ears. They are my girlfriends now... Then this last weekend this bunch of people came to visit me named Kathy and Bob and Alex and Tommy, and Kathy and Bob were old and boring like Mom and Dad, but Alex was 11 and Tommy was 2.5, and they were lots and lots and lots of fun and we played and played and played and played and ran and played and then they got a hose out and that was not as much fun because why would you want to be sprayed with a hose? but they thought it was great and Tommy's diagper got really really really big and heavy and I tried to help with it because it seemed interesting but for some reason the boring grownups wouldn't let me. And then there was all this food that smelled so good but guess what THEY MADE ME STAY OUTSIDE WHILE THEY ATE INSIDE and I cried and barked and they just laughed at me because it turns out they are all mean, so i just was sad and licked the porch under the grill until they let me back in. After the fun people left I was so tired out i fell asleep on the hard hard floor and Mom had to scoop me up onto the bed and i slept and slept and slept. I wish boys would come visit me more often because they are lots and lots and lots of fun, even when they are mean and don't let me eat dinner with them.
I could tell you lots more, but this is already really long, and I have some investigation to do: I've heard rumors that I'm going to get to visit someplace called "kennel" this weekend, so I need to find out what that's all about. I'll let you know when I find out anything.
This has been The Charlie Report.
I have to apologize for the long gap between Charlie Reports, as my support staff has not been as supportive as it could be. And so much has happened, too, that is so great and interesting and scary and everything! Maybe most important is I learned how to climb over that stupid gate Mom and Dad used to keep me in the kitchen during the day, so they had to take it down and now I get to be in the living room any time I want--ha! I heard them talking about getting a new taller gate, so I'm being very good and not making any messes in the living room so they won't do it. Well, no messes while they're at work. When they come home, it's a different story, but that's their fault for not paying attention to me ALL THE TIME, which they should be doing.
We've had lots of visitors, and they all loved me, of course. One time this Suzanne and this Tracey came to our house (supposedly they came up here to see a concert, but really it was to meet me), and they stayed in one of the secret guestrooms nobody lets me play in, and they both loved me, even though they were allergic, and I kissed them a lot and cleaned out their ears. They are my girlfriends now... Then this last weekend this bunch of people came to visit me named Kathy and Bob and Alex and Tommy, and Kathy and Bob were old and boring like Mom and Dad, but Alex was 11 and Tommy was 2.5, and they were lots and lots and lots of fun and we played and played and played and played and ran and played and then they got a hose out and that was not as much fun because why would you want to be sprayed with a hose? but they thought it was great and Tommy's diagper got really really really big and heavy and I tried to help with it because it seemed interesting but for some reason the boring grownups wouldn't let me. And then there was all this food that smelled so good but guess what THEY MADE ME STAY OUTSIDE WHILE THEY ATE INSIDE and I cried and barked and they just laughed at me because it turns out they are all mean, so i just was sad and licked the porch under the grill until they let me back in. After the fun people left I was so tired out i fell asleep on the hard hard floor and Mom had to scoop me up onto the bed and i slept and slept and slept. I wish boys would come visit me more often because they are lots and lots and lots of fun, even when they are mean and don't let me eat dinner with them.
I could tell you lots more, but this is already really long, and I have some investigation to do: I've heard rumors that I'm going to get to visit someplace called "kennel" this weekend, so I need to find out what that's all about. I'll let you know when I find out anything.
This has been The Charlie Report.
The Charlie Report for Monday, July 6, 2009...
...with me, Charlie.
It was The Weekend of Love for me, as I got to hang out with all sorts of lovely ladies. They all love me and can't keep their paws off me! It all started with, yes, more School for Dogs on Thursday. My girlfriend Bisha from last week was there and was still in love with me. She's exactly my size, only she's chocolate brown and part pit bull, but really real friendly and in love with ME. But then this OTHER beautiful dog name Brooke showed up and she was also chocolate brown and looked with Bisha only about 10 times bigger because she's a Lab and SHE feel in love with me, too, and so for an hour they both were in love with me and tried to be my girlfriend all the time and I was all "hey, ladies, one at a time" and it was hard to learn things because of all the noise and love, but luckily I already know "Down," which the Treat Lady was trying to teach us, but then she tried to teach us to drop things which was dumb because if I'm holding something it's because I want it so why would I drop it? (It turns out because you might get a treat.) Then we practiced more "walking on a leash" which was dumb because who can't figure that out, but it turns out what they really mean is "walk where *I* want to walk," which again is stoopid because if you're taking ME for a walk, shouldn't I be the one deciding where we go? I can't believe we're paying money for this craziness, but at least I get to meet chicks, so I put up with it.
Friday was very interesting because Mom and Dad did not abandon me! Instead, they stayed home and we all went for A WALK which was lots of fun, except that they kept stopping when I pulled (Dad) or kept changing direction when I pulled (Mom) which was crazy and stupid, but we had fun anyway, and then we got home to our front yard and A BEAUTIFUL DOG NAMED KARO came by with her mom and fell in love with me, and we played and played and played and played and played and ran and ran and played, and she's now my fourth girlfriend, even though she has no ears because before she was rescued by her nice mom some bad person cut her ears off all the way so she barely has stubs, which is THE WORST THING I EVER HEARD and yet she is so beautiful and sweet and friendly and nice, while if someone cut off MY ears I would pretty much be BITING EVERYONE IN THE WORLD but Karo just loves everyone, so I guess she's nicer than me. So Friday was great for me and guess what else IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY and i was a whole half year old, which is pretty big I think but I didn't get any cake or anything which was pretty mean.
BUT on Saturday I DID get a birthday present, a stuffed yellow dog named Colonel Mustard with two squeakers in it which is great and I love him. AND it was July 4 which is the Fourth of July which is a big deal because it is the day after my birthday and everyone who forgot has another chance to get me a present like Mom and Dad. We were having a quiet day in the backyard when MY JEAN AND JEFF came over and they brought MY NUMBER 1 GIRLFRIEND BELLA WITH THEM and we played and played and ran and played and ran and begged for food because all the people made food and ate it in front of us and didn't give us any which again is pretty mean any time but even worse on The Day After My Birthday, but I did have a good time with Bella and MY TRIP was there too until he had to go save the world and i showed everyone how i know how to roll over and everyone thought i was great. and then they all left me to have fun and i was all alone until after all the explosiions ended, but i was brave and didn't care.
Then yesterday. We went back to the park for dogs (with BELLA!) and there were lots of dogs there and I played with all of them even the really really big ones because I'm not scared of anyone even the droolers but there was THIS PRETTY DOG NAMED DINAH that really liked me and we played and ran a lot but i had to keep telling Bella that Dinah was just a friend and not to be jealous, but that's five girlfriends for me so i can see why Bella might get bent out of shape but I can't help being so attractive, I just am!
This has been The Charlie Report.
To remove yourself from The Charlie Report mailing list, please reply to this email with "Would you please stop sending me all those Charlie Reports? Dag!"
It was The Weekend of Love for me, as I got to hang out with all sorts of lovely ladies. They all love me and can't keep their paws off me! It all started with, yes, more School for Dogs on Thursday. My girlfriend Bisha from last week was there and was still in love with me. She's exactly my size, only she's chocolate brown and part pit bull, but really real friendly and in love with ME. But then this OTHER beautiful dog name Brooke showed up and she was also chocolate brown and looked with Bisha only about 10 times bigger because she's a Lab and SHE feel in love with me, too, and so for an hour they both were in love with me and tried to be my girlfriend all the time and I was all "hey, ladies, one at a time" and it was hard to learn things because of all the noise and love, but luckily I already know "Down," which the Treat Lady was trying to teach us, but then she tried to teach us to drop things which was dumb because if I'm holding something it's because I want it so why would I drop it? (It turns out because you might get a treat.) Then we practiced more "walking on a leash" which was dumb because who can't figure that out, but it turns out what they really mean is "walk where *I* want to walk," which again is stoopid because if you're taking ME for a walk, shouldn't I be the one deciding where we go? I can't believe we're paying money for this craziness, but at least I get to meet chicks, so I put up with it.
Friday was very interesting because Mom and Dad did not abandon me! Instead, they stayed home and we all went for A WALK which was lots of fun, except that they kept stopping when I pulled (Dad) or kept changing direction when I pulled (Mom) which was crazy and stupid, but we had fun anyway, and then we got home to our front yard and A BEAUTIFUL DOG NAMED KARO came by with her mom and fell in love with me, and we played and played and played and played and played and ran and ran and played, and she's now my fourth girlfriend, even though she has no ears because before she was rescued by her nice mom some bad person cut her ears off all the way so she barely has stubs, which is THE WORST THING I EVER HEARD and yet she is so beautiful and sweet and friendly and nice, while if someone cut off MY ears I would pretty much be BITING EVERYONE IN THE WORLD but Karo just loves everyone, so I guess she's nicer than me. So Friday was great for me and guess what else IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY and i was a whole half year old, which is pretty big I think but I didn't get any cake or anything which was pretty mean.
BUT on Saturday I DID get a birthday present, a stuffed yellow dog named Colonel Mustard with two squeakers in it which is great and I love him. AND it was July 4 which is the Fourth of July which is a big deal because it is the day after my birthday and everyone who forgot has another chance to get me a present like Mom and Dad. We were having a quiet day in the backyard when MY JEAN AND JEFF came over and they brought MY NUMBER 1 GIRLFRIEND BELLA WITH THEM and we played and played and ran and played and ran and begged for food because all the people made food and ate it in front of us and didn't give us any which again is pretty mean any time but even worse on The Day After My Birthday, but I did have a good time with Bella and MY TRIP was there too until he had to go save the world and i showed everyone how i know how to roll over and everyone thought i was great. and then they all left me to have fun and i was all alone until after all the explosiions ended, but i was brave and didn't care.
Then yesterday. We went back to the park for dogs (with BELLA!) and there were lots of dogs there and I played with all of them even the really really big ones because I'm not scared of anyone even the droolers but there was THIS PRETTY DOG NAMED DINAH that really liked me and we played and ran a lot but i had to keep telling Bella that Dinah was just a friend and not to be jealous, but that's five girlfriends for me so i can see why Bella might get bent out of shape but I can't help being so attractive, I just am!
This has been The Charlie Report.
To remove yourself from The Charlie Report mailing list, please reply to this email with "Would you please stop sending me all those Charlie Reports? Dag!"
The Charlie Report for Tuesday, July 1, 2009...
...with me, Charlie.
Life has changed very very very dramatically for me since the last Charlie Report, and not in a good way. In short, my daddy has abandoned me. It used to be that Mommy would get up in the morning and abandon me, and that was bad, and she still does it. But now after she leaves, Daddy gets up and feeds me and walks me and then HE ABANDONS ME, TOO! For the whole day! And I'm all alone there in the house by myself in the kitchen with only my toys to play with and bite. ALONE. This is a very very mean thing to do to a little baby puppy (who, by the way, will be exactly one-half year old in TWO DAY!). Luckily, there's this lady in the neighborhood who apparently realized that MY PARENTS ARE MEAN AND ABANDONED ME and she sneaks into our house every day to walk me and give me a treat so I don't waste away from being totally ignored and unappreciated, then she leaves Mommy and Daddy a note that I can't read but that probably says something like "You are the worst parents in the world for leaving your puppy alone all day." Now a lesser dog would pee and poop all over the place if they were abandoned like me, but I'm a really really good guy so I don't do that. I wait until they get home, and then pee on the floor right after Daddy lets me out in the yard. HA!
You may remember that in the last Charlie Report, I told you the horrible story of going to PetsMart to be taught things by the lady who picked me up by my scruff and made everyone laugh. Well, we went back again last Thursday, but this time we had a different teacher because we're going on a different day now because the other class was too early now that Daddy is ABANDONING ME EVERY DAY until at least 5:30. So anyway this new teacher was pretty nice and did NOT pick me up by my scruff because she said she wasn't sure how to like the other teacher, which made Mom and Dad sad because they wanted to learn how to do it so they could take a picture and laugh at me, which is just wrong. Anyway, there were two little dogs who were shy in class, and I went up to them to say hello, but then there was this OTHER dog who was a girl and who was chocolate brown and just my size and who Mommy said was like Lucy and we FELL IN LOVE and we played and played and played and played and played until they made us stop so we could learn things but we kept trying to get back together so we could play some more but they wouldn't let us because they wanted us to Sit (which I already know, duh) and walk "nicely" on a leash, which was not bad because they had a stick with peanut butter on the end and if you walk nicely you can lick the peanut butter as you walk until the peanut butter runs out, and then you can pull like usual. When class was over, the teacher said that in the next class (!) they're going to try to teach us "off." "OFF"! Good luck, teacher!
This has been The Charlie Report.
To remove yourself from The Charlie Report mailing list, please reply to this email with "Would you please stop sending me all those Charlie Reports? Dag!"
Life has changed very very very dramatically for me since the last Charlie Report, and not in a good way. In short, my daddy has abandoned me. It used to be that Mommy would get up in the morning and abandon me, and that was bad, and she still does it. But now after she leaves, Daddy gets up and feeds me and walks me and then HE ABANDONS ME, TOO! For the whole day! And I'm all alone there in the house by myself in the kitchen with only my toys to play with and bite. ALONE. This is a very very mean thing to do to a little baby puppy (who, by the way, will be exactly one-half year old in TWO DAY!). Luckily, there's this lady in the neighborhood who apparently realized that MY PARENTS ARE MEAN AND ABANDONED ME and she sneaks into our house every day to walk me and give me a treat so I don't waste away from being totally ignored and unappreciated, then she leaves Mommy and Daddy a note that I can't read but that probably says something like "You are the worst parents in the world for leaving your puppy alone all day." Now a lesser dog would pee and poop all over the place if they were abandoned like me, but I'm a really really good guy so I don't do that. I wait until they get home, and then pee on the floor right after Daddy lets me out in the yard. HA!
You may remember that in the last Charlie Report, I told you the horrible story of going to PetsMart to be taught things by the lady who picked me up by my scruff and made everyone laugh. Well, we went back again last Thursday, but this time we had a different teacher because we're going on a different day now because the other class was too early now that Daddy is ABANDONING ME EVERY DAY until at least 5:30. So anyway this new teacher was pretty nice and did NOT pick me up by my scruff because she said she wasn't sure how to like the other teacher, which made Mom and Dad sad because they wanted to learn how to do it so they could take a picture and laugh at me, which is just wrong. Anyway, there were two little dogs who were shy in class, and I went up to them to say hello, but then there was this OTHER dog who was a girl and who was chocolate brown and just my size and who Mommy said was like Lucy and we FELL IN LOVE and we played and played and played and played and played until they made us stop so we could learn things but we kept trying to get back together so we could play some more but they wouldn't let us because they wanted us to Sit (which I already know, duh) and walk "nicely" on a leash, which was not bad because they had a stick with peanut butter on the end and if you walk nicely you can lick the peanut butter as you walk until the peanut butter runs out, and then you can pull like usual. When class was over, the teacher said that in the next class (!) they're going to try to teach us "off." "OFF"! Good luck, teacher!
This has been The Charlie Report.
To remove yourself from The Charlie Report mailing list, please reply to this email with "Would you please stop sending me all those Charlie Reports? Dag!"
The Charlie Report for Monday, June 22, 2009...
...with me, Charlie.
This was a very exhausting weekend, and I'll tell you why. The short version: school, bath, dog park.
It all started on Friday after Mom got home from her daily abandonment of me. I gave her my usual kissies and nose nibbles, and got my dinner, but then we all got in the car to go to the Big House of Toys and Treats (aka Petsmart). which is great because, well, it's full of toys and treats there, but then instead of wandering around enjoying all the sites and smells, we went into this little circus ring in the middle of the place, where there were these three people with a little nervous white puppy who was smaller than me but one month older than me whose name was Mooshie. Mooshie was very nervous because she had never met any dogs before, so I went up and introduced myself and was very friendly to her and also her people because who knows they might have treats. THEN this lady came into the ring and tried to teach us things! I mean! It's like she didn't know that I already knew things, so I showed her how smart I was, and she used me to show everyone how to learn things and she gave me a massage and everything was going great BUT THEN SHE PICKED ME UP BY THE SCRUFF OF MY NECK AND I JUST HUNG THERE LIKE A FISH ON A LINE but oddly it didn't bother me and i just hung there in the air all relaxed until she put me down, but Mom and Dad couldn't stop laughing which I thought was kind of rude, and now they want the lady to teach them how to pick me up that way so they can take a picture and laugh some more. Which *I* think is another way of saying "Charlie won't you pee on the couch again?" Innyways, apparently we're going back next week to do this again, if you can believe it. I can't imagine what else there could be to learn, but if there are treats involved, I guess I'm game.
Saturday. Mom and Dad abandoned me to go see a stupid movie THAT THEY'D ALREADY SEEN and then eat fish and chips at some dumb place that dogs can't go to. Finally they came home and gave me dinner and let me play in the backyard so I did and was rolling around and rolling around and rolling around and then Mom's all "wait a minute, what are you rolling in" and I'm all "My own poop, of course!" and then you would have thought the world was ending, the way they acted and next thing I know they've tossed me in the bathtub and are spraying water on me and shampooing me and going "Eeeeeewww" and it was just awful and I decided they must hate me an awful lot.
Naturally Sunday I thought they'd be returning me to Lost Dog Rescues for a refund or another dog that fits their exacting standards. But surprisingly this was not the case. Instead we drove over to MY JEAN AND JEFF'S HOUSE where BELLA MY GIRLFRIEND lives! And THEN we all drove to this thing called a dog park, which is a park for dogs. And there were all these other dogs that I never before in there with no leashes on chasing balls and each other and stuff and we went in there and they took OUR leashes off and Bella ran off and I followed her and then these BIG dogs came over and sniffed at us and then they ran away and then they came running up really fast chasing a ball and totally RAN OVER ME which was VERY surprising but i was brave and I went after them even though they made me nervous and then they ran over me AGAIN but I continued to be brave even when one really big guy stood over me and drooled on my head because THAT'S HOW I ROLL. So we stayed at the park of dogs for a long time and I really liked it so much and I hope we go back because, yes, we did leave finally and go home and i slept and slept and slept and slept because IT WAS SO EXCITING!!
This has been The Charlie Report.
This was a very exhausting weekend, and I'll tell you why. The short version: school, bath, dog park.
It all started on Friday after Mom got home from her daily abandonment of me. I gave her my usual kissies and nose nibbles, and got my dinner, but then we all got in the car to go to the Big House of Toys and Treats (aka Petsmart). which is great because, well, it's full of toys and treats there, but then instead of wandering around enjoying all the sites and smells, we went into this little circus ring in the middle of the place, where there were these three people with a little nervous white puppy who was smaller than me but one month older than me whose name was Mooshie. Mooshie was very nervous because she had never met any dogs before, so I went up and introduced myself and was very friendly to her and also her people because who knows they might have treats. THEN this lady came into the ring and tried to teach us things! I mean! It's like she didn't know that I already knew things, so I showed her how smart I was, and she used me to show everyone how to learn things and she gave me a massage and everything was going great BUT THEN SHE PICKED ME UP BY THE SCRUFF OF MY NECK AND I JUST HUNG THERE LIKE A FISH ON A LINE but oddly it didn't bother me and i just hung there in the air all relaxed until she put me down, but Mom and Dad couldn't stop laughing which I thought was kind of rude, and now they want the lady to teach them how to pick me up that way so they can take a picture and laugh some more. Which *I* think is another way of saying "Charlie won't you pee on the couch again?" Innyways, apparently we're going back next week to do this again, if you can believe it. I can't imagine what else there could be to learn, but if there are treats involved, I guess I'm game.
Saturday. Mom and Dad abandoned me to go see a stupid movie THAT THEY'D ALREADY SEEN and then eat fish and chips at some dumb place that dogs can't go to. Finally they came home and gave me dinner and let me play in the backyard so I did and was rolling around and rolling around and rolling around and then Mom's all "wait a minute, what are you rolling in" and I'm all "My own poop, of course!" and then you would have thought the world was ending, the way they acted and next thing I know they've tossed me in the bathtub and are spraying water on me and shampooing me and going "Eeeeeewww" and it was just awful and I decided they must hate me an awful lot.
Naturally Sunday I thought they'd be returning me to Lost Dog Rescues for a refund or another dog that fits their exacting standards. But surprisingly this was not the case. Instead we drove over to MY JEAN AND JEFF'S HOUSE where BELLA MY GIRLFRIEND lives! And THEN we all drove to this thing called a dog park, which is a park for dogs. And there were all these other dogs that I never before in there with no leashes on chasing balls and each other and stuff and we went in there and they took OUR leashes off and Bella ran off and I followed her and then these BIG dogs came over and sniffed at us and then they ran away and then they came running up really fast chasing a ball and totally RAN OVER ME which was VERY surprising but i was brave and I went after them even though they made me nervous and then they ran over me AGAIN but I continued to be brave even when one really big guy stood over me and drooled on my head because THAT'S HOW I ROLL. So we stayed at the park of dogs for a long time and I really liked it so much and I hope we go back because, yes, we did leave finally and go home and i slept and slept and slept and slept because IT WAS SO EXCITING!!
This has been The Charlie Report.
A VERY SPECIAL Charlie Report for Monday, June 15, 2009...
...with me, Charlie
This past weekend I went on the longest drive in the car in my whole entire life for 9 hours which is almost forwever to a place called Ohio where some gray-hairs live who are my grandpa and grandma but you might know as Uncle Fred and Aunt Mary. Maybe your dogs are very bad when they ride in a car for 9 whole hours but I was very very very good and mostly slept in my bedroom which we brought in the backseat, but I was also very good sometimes sitting in Daddy's or Mommy's lap in the front seat, which was very interesting because you can watch other cars and trucks going by and the wind blows on you and you can stick your nose out the window until Mommy makes you stop it. And you get to stop in Morgantown and get gas at a gas station and pea in a vacant lot after Daddy walks you around for 10 minutes. And then you get to stop in Wheeling at the Fish Market and watch Mom and Dad eat fish sandwiches while you get NO fish sandwiches, which is not as much fun but people walk by and talk about how cute you are, so it all evens out. I guess.
But THEN you finally get to this Ohio place and get out at this house with a really big fenced-in yard and there is this Grandpa and Grandma and they LOVE you and let you kiss them and they pet you and let you run around in crazy circles in their backyard which is like a jungle with lots of secret place to hide in and things to smell which are interested but with almost no sticks, which is sad. And inside their house it is very interesting and they let you walk all over the place smelling things and licking the floor and picking up socks like it's so cute (which it is). And then you spend all day the next day playing and playing in the yard and getting loved by the Gray Hairs and getting your picture taken because you're so cute and almost snatching food out of their hands because they're not as fast as me, but Mommy and Daddy were always watching, so I never got anything, although I almost got a cream puff when I jumped on Grandpa's lap when no one was expecting it--ha ha! Saturday afternoon and night I was pretty sleepy from all that playing and fell asleep on Grandma, and she said I could stay with her and live and I was thinking about it because I think I could get away with a lot at her house, but then I remembered I have a lot of toys at home plus my girlfriend Bella, too, even though I cheated on her with the Gray Hairs' neighbor dog Sadie. So yesterday we got back in our car and drove for another 9 hours if you can believe it and came back to our house, and I miss Grandpa and Grandma but I do like my house, too, but I hope I can go back and visit again because next time that cream puff is MINE!
This has been The Charlie Report.
P.S. I didn't pee or poop in Grandma and Grandpa's house not even once; they think I'm so good!
P.P.S. Lookit these great pictures of me visiting Grandma and Grandpa!
http://www3.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=868684006/a=18657071_18657071/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/
This past weekend I went on the longest drive in the car in my whole entire life for 9 hours which is almost forwever to a place called Ohio where some gray-hairs live who are my grandpa and grandma but you might know as Uncle Fred and Aunt Mary. Maybe your dogs are very bad when they ride in a car for 9 whole hours but I was very very very good and mostly slept in my bedroom which we brought in the backseat, but I was also very good sometimes sitting in Daddy's or Mommy's lap in the front seat, which was very interesting because you can watch other cars and trucks going by and the wind blows on you and you can stick your nose out the window until Mommy makes you stop it. And you get to stop in Morgantown and get gas at a gas station and pea in a vacant lot after Daddy walks you around for 10 minutes. And then you get to stop in Wheeling at the Fish Market and watch Mom and Dad eat fish sandwiches while you get NO fish sandwiches, which is not as much fun but people walk by and talk about how cute you are, so it all evens out. I guess.
But THEN you finally get to this Ohio place and get out at this house with a really big fenced-in yard and there is this Grandpa and Grandma and they LOVE you and let you kiss them and they pet you and let you run around in crazy circles in their backyard which is like a jungle with lots of secret place to hide in and things to smell which are interested but with almost no sticks, which is sad. And inside their house it is very interesting and they let you walk all over the place smelling things and licking the floor and picking up socks like it's so cute (which it is). And then you spend all day the next day playing and playing in the yard and getting loved by the Gray Hairs and getting your picture taken because you're so cute and almost snatching food out of their hands because they're not as fast as me, but Mommy and Daddy were always watching, so I never got anything, although I almost got a cream puff when I jumped on Grandpa's lap when no one was expecting it--ha ha! Saturday afternoon and night I was pretty sleepy from all that playing and fell asleep on Grandma, and she said I could stay with her and live and I was thinking about it because I think I could get away with a lot at her house, but then I remembered I have a lot of toys at home plus my girlfriend Bella, too, even though I cheated on her with the Gray Hairs' neighbor dog Sadie. So yesterday we got back in our car and drove for another 9 hours if you can believe it and came back to our house, and I miss Grandpa and Grandma but I do like my house, too, but I hope I can go back and visit again because next time that cream puff is MINE!
This has been The Charlie Report.
P.S. I didn't pee or poop in Grandma and Grandpa's house not even once; they think I'm so good!
P.P.S. Lookit these great pictures of me visiting Grandma and Grandpa!
http://www3.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=868684006/a=18657071_18657071/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/
The Charlie Report for Thursday, June 11, 2009...
...with me, Charlie.
Once again, I prove that I am smarter than Daddy and Mommy. They thought they would be so smart and leave me by myself, only this time instead of leaving me in my Charlie Crate, they would leave me in the kitchen with a gate keeping me from getting out. Now they tried this before and I escaped because of being so strong and completely knocking down the dumb gate to get in the living room. But yesterday Daddy made the gate really really tight so I couldn't know it down in spite of being really really strong. So he left me and I couldn't get out by the time he got home and he thought he was so smart. BUT THEN he went back out again, which was totally mean, and he was gone much much longer. And it gave me time to figure out how to escape!
Daddy couldn't figure out how I did it for the longest time, until he noticed I knocked a knick knack off the sill of that window between the dining room and living room. Then he figured out that I had jumped on a dining chair in the dining room and through the window onto the sofa in the living room (and pee'ed on the sofa for good measure). Ha hahahahaha!
Well, ha ha no more, because Daddy moved that dining chair, and now I can't get up high enough to jump through the window anymore. I must work on a new plan for escape.
This has been The Charlie Report.
Once again, I prove that I am smarter than Daddy and Mommy. They thought they would be so smart and leave me by myself, only this time instead of leaving me in my Charlie Crate, they would leave me in the kitchen with a gate keeping me from getting out. Now they tried this before and I escaped because of being so strong and completely knocking down the dumb gate to get in the living room. But yesterday Daddy made the gate really really tight so I couldn't know it down in spite of being really really strong. So he left me and I couldn't get out by the time he got home and he thought he was so smart. BUT THEN he went back out again, which was totally mean, and he was gone much much longer. And it gave me time to figure out how to escape!
Daddy couldn't figure out how I did it for the longest time, until he noticed I knocked a knick knack off the sill of that window between the dining room and living room. Then he figured out that I had jumped on a dining chair in the dining room and through the window onto the sofa in the living room (and pee'ed on the sofa for good measure). Ha hahahahaha!
Well, ha ha no more, because Daddy moved that dining chair, and now I can't get up high enough to jump through the window anymore. I must work on a new plan for escape.
This has been The Charlie Report.
May 27, 2009: The Charlie Report for Wednesday, May 27...
...with me, Charlie.
Things have been very very busy for me. I have finished up my dips and am mange-free, thank goodness, and I just keep getting bigger and bigger from growing all the time. I am now twice as big as when Mom and Dad adopted me, and am closer and closer to taking over the entire house. I've had some really fun times lately: this nice lady named Marylou who is my grandma came to visit me and I liked her very much and sat on the couch in the sunroom with her a lot. And while she was here we had a cookout with our neighbors and my Jean and Jeff and my girlfriend Bella which was lots of fun even if no one let me have any of the interesting food, not even the little kids! And I got to go to a thing called a farmers' market, where there was lots more food no one would let me have, but also lots of people and dogs who loved me. AND I got to hang out in the front yard with Mom while she dug up little plants and buried other things. And also I pooped AND pee'ed in the house a bunch of times over the weekend because WHY NOT???
So this is kind of a short report, but if you go to the place in the link below, you can see lots of new pictures of me PLUS cool videos of me and Bella and me and DADDY, which you should really watch because Daddy is crazy and Mommy says she's never kissing him again after this.
http://www3.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=678714006/a=18657071_18657071/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/
This has been The Charlie Report.
Things have been very very busy for me. I have finished up my dips and am mange-free, thank goodness, and I just keep getting bigger and bigger from growing all the time. I am now twice as big as when Mom and Dad adopted me, and am closer and closer to taking over the entire house. I've had some really fun times lately: this nice lady named Marylou who is my grandma came to visit me and I liked her very much and sat on the couch in the sunroom with her a lot. And while she was here we had a cookout with our neighbors and my Jean and Jeff and my girlfriend Bella which was lots of fun even if no one let me have any of the interesting food, not even the little kids! And I got to go to a thing called a farmers' market, where there was lots more food no one would let me have, but also lots of people and dogs who loved me. AND I got to hang out in the front yard with Mom while she dug up little plants and buried other things. And also I pooped AND pee'ed in the house a bunch of times over the weekend because WHY NOT???
So this is kind of a short report, but if you go to the place in the link below, you can see lots of new pictures of me PLUS cool videos of me and Bella and me and DADDY, which you should really watch because Daddy is crazy and Mommy says she's never kissing him again after this.
http://www3.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=678714006/a=18657071_18657071/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/
This has been The Charlie Report.
June 9, 2009: The Charlie Report for Tuesday, June 9, 2009
With me, Charlie.
So OH MY GOSH MY TEETH ARE FALLING OUT! I was sitting on Mom's lap in the Charlie Chair, and she and Dad were snuggling me, and then PUH I spit out a thing and it was my TOOTH and Mom said "looks like a molar" like it was no big deal but MY TOOTH CAME OUT! And then Sunday Mom and Dad were doing their working out thing in the basement and Mom started doing pushups and then she stopped and said to Dad "Hey, it's another tooth" and IT WAS MY TOOTH AND IT WAS ONE OF MY FAVORITE POINTY ONES FROM THE FRONT but they acted like ti was all cute or something, and now both of my teeth are on the drum table in the living room INSTEAD OF IN MY MOUTH!
Innyways, I am all mange-free now, and I'm going for a long long long car ride to visit some gray-hairs in Ohio who are my grandparents and who hopefully do not collect teeth from innocent puppies. If they are nice to me, I will kiss them and clean out their ears. If they are mean and try to kick me, I will chew up their house and they will be so sorry they invited me! Mom says they are very nice and will love me, but I think it's best to be prepared. I have to decide what toys to pack, so I gotta go.
This has been The Charlie Report.
So OH MY GOSH MY TEETH ARE FALLING OUT! I was sitting on Mom's lap in the Charlie Chair, and she and Dad were snuggling me, and then PUH I spit out a thing and it was my TOOTH and Mom said "looks like a molar" like it was no big deal but MY TOOTH CAME OUT! And then Sunday Mom and Dad were doing their working out thing in the basement and Mom started doing pushups and then she stopped and said to Dad "Hey, it's another tooth" and IT WAS MY TOOTH AND IT WAS ONE OF MY FAVORITE POINTY ONES FROM THE FRONT but they acted like ti was all cute or something, and now both of my teeth are on the drum table in the living room INSTEAD OF IN MY MOUTH!
Innyways, I am all mange-free now, and I'm going for a long long long car ride to visit some gray-hairs in Ohio who are my grandparents and who hopefully do not collect teeth from innocent puppies. If they are nice to me, I will kiss them and clean out their ears. If they are mean and try to kick me, I will chew up their house and they will be so sorry they invited me! Mom says they are very nice and will love me, but I think it's best to be prepared. I have to decide what toys to pack, so I gotta go.
This has been The Charlie Report.
May 11, 2009: Shocking Revelations! Exciting Adventures! This is The Charle Report for May 11
...with ME, Charlie.
Shocking Revelation! Friday Mom came home early and we went for a walk while Dad was at a doctor appointment. And there was this lady in our front yard with another dog, and she walks dogs for people, and she said there was ANOTHER little beagle like me just up the street and that we could be brothers because we're so much alike. So Mom and I went up the street to the house and guess what, it IS my brother! He was named Remi, but now they call him Jack which is a much better name, but I didn't get to see him because he was at the vet guess what being DIPPED just like me! wow! so i can't wait to see Remi-Jack again and see what he's been up to and if he knows where Gunner and Ruger are and whether they got better names now, too, i sure hope so.... Innyways, I also on Friday got to take my first trip to a place called Petsmart where Mom buys my dinner and boy is that ever an exciting place. It smells like about a million dogs and a million treats and all these strange people are there, and i barked at a guy and got a little scared by some of the strangers, but i got over it, and i also got to talk to some other dogs, and Mom bought me a big bag of food and some toys and then we went home. Boy, did I sleep well Friday night.
Saturday started out great but then got totally boring and annoying: Mom and Dad took me over to visit my Jean and Jeff and Bella, and Bella and I played and played and played and played. But then they took me home and left me alone in my cave AGAIN to go see some movie about Star Tricks and then they came home later and were all Star Trick Star Trick Star Trick which was boring. BUT yesterday was much better because we spent ALL DAY OUTSIDE! Dad and Mom built this thing behind the shed out of chicken wire and Dad shoveled all that great dirt and leaves and stuff into the thing so i couldn't play in it anymore and it was all neat and tidy and boring. And then he shoveled up all this dirt in the big wheel thing, and Mom took it to the side of the house and starting piling it up around these "potato" plants of hers, and she tied my leash to the big wheel thing so i could be with her. And then my friends Elizabeth and Austin from next door came out with blankets and played with me on the grass while mom messed up the garden (you're supposed to dig OUT the dirt and eat the plants and things, but she was putting plants and things IN the dirt and adding more dirt on top of it!). Dad was running The Big Red Monster all over the grass, and when he was done he came to help us, and then Elizabeth brought everyone a popsicle except for me, which was mean. And then we went back into the backyard and Mom put more things IN the dirt, and then we all laid down in the grass and I cleaned out Dad's ears. Then Dad grilled hot dogs and I got nothing as usual, but I was really really tired and mostly just slept the rest of the evening until bedtime, when I slept some more.
This has been The Charlie Report.
Shocking Revelation! Friday Mom came home early and we went for a walk while Dad was at a doctor appointment. And there was this lady in our front yard with another dog, and she walks dogs for people, and she said there was ANOTHER little beagle like me just up the street and that we could be brothers because we're so much alike. So Mom and I went up the street to the house and guess what, it IS my brother! He was named Remi, but now they call him Jack which is a much better name, but I didn't get to see him because he was at the vet guess what being DIPPED just like me! wow! so i can't wait to see Remi-Jack again and see what he's been up to and if he knows where Gunner and Ruger are and whether they got better names now, too, i sure hope so.... Innyways, I also on Friday got to take my first trip to a place called Petsmart where Mom buys my dinner and boy is that ever an exciting place. It smells like about a million dogs and a million treats and all these strange people are there, and i barked at a guy and got a little scared by some of the strangers, but i got over it, and i also got to talk to some other dogs, and Mom bought me a big bag of food and some toys and then we went home. Boy, did I sleep well Friday night.
Saturday started out great but then got totally boring and annoying: Mom and Dad took me over to visit my Jean and Jeff and Bella, and Bella and I played and played and played and played. But then they took me home and left me alone in my cave AGAIN to go see some movie about Star Tricks and then they came home later and were all Star Trick Star Trick Star Trick which was boring. BUT yesterday was much better because we spent ALL DAY OUTSIDE! Dad and Mom built this thing behind the shed out of chicken wire and Dad shoveled all that great dirt and leaves and stuff into the thing so i couldn't play in it anymore and it was all neat and tidy and boring. And then he shoveled up all this dirt in the big wheel thing, and Mom took it to the side of the house and starting piling it up around these "potato" plants of hers, and she tied my leash to the big wheel thing so i could be with her. And then my friends Elizabeth and Austin from next door came out with blankets and played with me on the grass while mom messed up the garden (you're supposed to dig OUT the dirt and eat the plants and things, but she was putting plants and things IN the dirt and adding more dirt on top of it!). Dad was running The Big Red Monster all over the grass, and when he was done he came to help us, and then Elizabeth brought everyone a popsicle except for me, which was mean. And then we went back into the backyard and Mom put more things IN the dirt, and then we all laid down in the grass and I cleaned out Dad's ears. Then Dad grilled hot dogs and I got nothing as usual, but I was really really tired and mostly just slept the rest of the evening until bedtime, when I slept some more.
This has been The Charlie Report.
May 5, 2009: This a Special Charlie Report for Tuesday, May 5
With me, Charlie.
Yesterday and this morning brought me from the highest highs to the lowest lows. All day long was pretty boring because it was raining and we couldn't go out and play a lot so i just was biting everything in the house while Dad kept saying NO. then mom came home and after a little while we all got in the car and drove to a DIFFERENT HOUSE where my Jean and Jeff live with their dog BELLA that came to visit those times and me and Bella ran and ran and ran and played and ran and played in the backyard with Jeff and Daddy. And then all the people sat at a big table and ate food that was too far up for me to see which was mean, but me and Bella just played the whole time with her toys which was great. and THEN we all went in the living room and me and Bella played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played until I had to go and drink a whole lot of water, which I'm not normally allowed to drink any water after 6pm but no one was paying attention and then we played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played until Mom and Dad said we had to go home, so we went home and I went potty and then I fell asleep and Mom took me upstairs and it was bedtime.
BUT THEN I woke up this morning and now i know why they don't normally let me have water after 6pm because OMIGOSH I HADDA GO REAL BAD REAL FAST and i cried and Mom started to get up but then it was too late and i pee'ed in my bed, and we went downstairs and I pee'ed outside and then I pee'ed in the kitchen and later when Mom was gone I pee'ed in the living room and it's just been pee pee pee pee pee all morning. So just don't give puppies water after 6pm or you'll be so sorry and everything will be very wet and smelly.
This has been The Charlie Report.
Yesterday and this morning brought me from the highest highs to the lowest lows. All day long was pretty boring because it was raining and we couldn't go out and play a lot so i just was biting everything in the house while Dad kept saying NO. then mom came home and after a little while we all got in the car and drove to a DIFFERENT HOUSE where my Jean and Jeff live with their dog BELLA that came to visit those times and me and Bella ran and ran and ran and played and ran and played in the backyard with Jeff and Daddy. And then all the people sat at a big table and ate food that was too far up for me to see which was mean, but me and Bella just played the whole time with her toys which was great. and THEN we all went in the living room and me and Bella played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played until I had to go and drink a whole lot of water, which I'm not normally allowed to drink any water after 6pm but no one was paying attention and then we played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played until Mom and Dad said we had to go home, so we went home and I went potty and then I fell asleep and Mom took me upstairs and it was bedtime.
BUT THEN I woke up this morning and now i know why they don't normally let me have water after 6pm because OMIGOSH I HADDA GO REAL BAD REAL FAST and i cried and Mom started to get up but then it was too late and i pee'ed in my bed, and we went downstairs and I pee'ed outside and then I pee'ed in the kitchen and later when Mom was gone I pee'ed in the living room and it's just been pee pee pee pee pee all morning. So just don't give puppies water after 6pm or you'll be so sorry and everything will be very wet and smelly.
This has been The Charlie Report.
May 4, 2009: This is The Charlie Report for Monday, May 4
With me, Charlie.
So on Saturday I was 17 weeks old and yesterday was my 4-month birthday and did anyone do anything special for me? NO! NO THEY DIDN'T! And it was rainy and boring all weekend AND Mom and Dad actually went out to a movie about wolverines and LEFT ME ALONE which was SO WRONG but don't worry, I'm okay and I'll pay them back for sure. At least my friend Trip came to visit me and he was really nice and rubbed my tummy for a long time but then HE LEFT TO GO TO WORK even though I told him how mean everyone was to me, so I just chewed on the recliner handle and on Dad's shoes because it's so unfair. And all Mom and Dad do is laugh because Dad's taking me back to the doctor place again on Wednesday to DIP ME IN ANTI-MANGE-GOOP AGAIN. At least I might get to go visit my friends Jean and Jeff tonight; I know they'll be nice to me, and they have that Bella dog who's nice, too.
Innyways, it's another boring rainy day today, so I have to figure out how to keep myself and Dad entertained. Let me know if you have any idears.
This has been The Charlie Report.
So on Saturday I was 17 weeks old and yesterday was my 4-month birthday and did anyone do anything special for me? NO! NO THEY DIDN'T! And it was rainy and boring all weekend AND Mom and Dad actually went out to a movie about wolverines and LEFT ME ALONE which was SO WRONG but don't worry, I'm okay and I'll pay them back for sure. At least my friend Trip came to visit me and he was really nice and rubbed my tummy for a long time but then HE LEFT TO GO TO WORK even though I told him how mean everyone was to me, so I just chewed on the recliner handle and on Dad's shoes because it's so unfair. And all Mom and Dad do is laugh because Dad's taking me back to the doctor place again on Wednesday to DIP ME IN ANTI-MANGE-GOOP AGAIN. At least I might get to go visit my friends Jean and Jeff tonight; I know they'll be nice to me, and they have that Bella dog who's nice, too.
Innyways, it's another boring rainy day today, so I have to figure out how to keep myself and Dad entertained. Let me know if you have any idears.
This has been The Charlie Report.
May 1, 2009: This is The Charlie Report for Friday, May 1
With me, Charlie.
This has been a week of ups and downs for me. Things started off well when I got my own FaceBook page (under Charles Quincy Sullivan) and now I have 15 friends which is probably more than anyone else on the Interwebs I think. If you want to be my friend, you should check it out. So that was great, but then Wednesday when Mom came home, she and Dad put my in the car and drove me back to that doctor place, which was not so bad at first because everybody was nice to me because I was the cutest like always. We went into the little room with that Dr. Rogers, and I was so good that I didn't growl this time when he stuck that temperature thingie up my bottom. And guess what I weigh two more pounds than I did the last time we were there--10.6 pounds, really big. So that was great, but then Dr. Rogers took me in the back and gave me two little shots, which I was very brave about and didn't cry about but then he brought out this GIANT SHOT THING TO PUT A MICROCHIP IN ME and believe me I let him and everyone else know how I felt about THAT, and you think they would have stopped there but no, then they scraped off a little bit of my skin and looked at it with a microscope and said there were EVIL MANGE BUGS in it and then they dipped me in anti-mange-bug goop AND i have to go back next week and do it AGAIN and Mom and Dad are gonna let them do it!! after than, we went home and I was just exhausted.
Yesterday, I was kinda tired all day from the shots, and Mom had a tummy ache and stayed home from work, and we laid on my couch in the sun room all day and slept and i was really really good, no really! Also, I went outside this one time and a little bird flew right over my head and landed close by, which I never saw before, so I chased it but it flew away. Later we all watched the Red Sox and the Celtics games on TV (well, I slept mostly) and then Mom and I went to bed early because Mom's a big baby who goes to bed early.
This has been The Charlie Report.
This has been a week of ups and downs for me. Things started off well when I got my own FaceBook page (under Charles Quincy Sullivan) and now I have 15 friends which is probably more than anyone else on the Interwebs I think. If you want to be my friend, you should check it out. So that was great, but then Wednesday when Mom came home, she and Dad put my in the car and drove me back to that doctor place, which was not so bad at first because everybody was nice to me because I was the cutest like always. We went into the little room with that Dr. Rogers, and I was so good that I didn't growl this time when he stuck that temperature thingie up my bottom. And guess what I weigh two more pounds than I did the last time we were there--10.6 pounds, really big. So that was great, but then Dr. Rogers took me in the back and gave me two little shots, which I was very brave about and didn't cry about but then he brought out this GIANT SHOT THING TO PUT A MICROCHIP IN ME and believe me I let him and everyone else know how I felt about THAT, and you think they would have stopped there but no, then they scraped off a little bit of my skin and looked at it with a microscope and said there were EVIL MANGE BUGS in it and then they dipped me in anti-mange-bug goop AND i have to go back next week and do it AGAIN and Mom and Dad are gonna let them do it!! after than, we went home and I was just exhausted.
Yesterday, I was kinda tired all day from the shots, and Mom had a tummy ache and stayed home from work, and we laid on my couch in the sun room all day and slept and i was really really good, no really! Also, I went outside this one time and a little bird flew right over my head and landed close by, which I never saw before, so I chased it but it flew away. Later we all watched the Red Sox and the Celtics games on TV (well, I slept mostly) and then Mom and I went to bed early because Mom's a big baby who goes to bed early.
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 27, 2009: A Very Disturbing Charlie Report for Monday, April 27
With me, Charlie.
This past weekend was one of disturbing events that drained me of all energy, as you can see. It all started Friday night, when I was attacked by a giant squeaky flea with six long legs and a big nose. This monstrous beast has taken up residence in our house and I am constantly doing battle with it to keep the family safe. Ungrateful family, I should say, as Mom and Dad tend to giggle at my efforts. But a hero doesn't fight for the applause, so I soldier on. Saturday Dad and Mom worked in the backyard digging in the dirt, but when i tried to help by digging under the fence, they got all huffy and leashed me to the hammock! Did I mention how ungrateful they are?
But the worst came Sunday: Mom took me out to the back patio on a leash to sit by the little wall while Dad took this big red thing on wheels out of the little house back there that they won't let me play in, and everything was just fine until Dad pulled this string on the red thing and OH MY GOSH IT WOKE UP AND IT WAS MAD AND WENT ROOOOWWWWWWWRRRRRRR AND ATE ALL THE GRASS AND WOULDN'T STOP AND I HID BEHIND MOM and then Dad rolled it away into the grass and i came out from behind Mom but then DAD PUSHED IT BACK TOWARDS US AND IT WAS SCARY AND I HID BEHIND SOME BRICKS but then Dad pushed it away again and I snuck out and watched and WHAT THE HECK DOES HE KEEP PUSHING IT BACK THIS WAY FOR WHEN IT'S SO MAD but luckily he pushed it away again and I finally laid down in the mulch with my chin on the wall next to Mom for protection and watched until the red monster suddenly stopped ROWRING and Dad took it into the front yard, where it got mad all over again but at least we didn't have to see it thank goodness because it was pretty much the scariest thing I ever saw in my whole entire life.
But the weekend's horrors were not finished quite yet. After dinner, Mom took me outside to go potty which I did because I'm such a good boy. But then she took me upstairs into the secret room where I used to pee until they started keeping the door shut on me. Then Daddy came in and he put me in this giant tub thing and then they sprayed water all over me and then put this smelly foamy stuff all over me and scrubbed me and tried to act like it was so great, and I thought I might leave but Daddy wouldn't let me out and then they sprayed all the foamy stuff off me with MORE water and acted like it was so great even though I was obviously very sad about it. Then they both rubbed me all over with towels until all my hair was standing straight up and then they let me escape and we got on the bed and I was all crazy because WHAT THE HECK! and i bit everything and jumped on everyone and then suddenly fell asleep because this was just the craziest day I ever had in my whole entire life and I pretty much slept the rest of the evening.
Any ideas for revenge will be greatly appreciated.
This has been A Very Disturbing Charlie Report.
This past weekend was one of disturbing events that drained me of all energy, as you can see. It all started Friday night, when I was attacked by a giant squeaky flea with six long legs and a big nose. This monstrous beast has taken up residence in our house and I am constantly doing battle with it to keep the family safe. Ungrateful family, I should say, as Mom and Dad tend to giggle at my efforts. But a hero doesn't fight for the applause, so I soldier on. Saturday Dad and Mom worked in the backyard digging in the dirt, but when i tried to help by digging under the fence, they got all huffy and leashed me to the hammock! Did I mention how ungrateful they are?
But the worst came Sunday: Mom took me out to the back patio on a leash to sit by the little wall while Dad took this big red thing on wheels out of the little house back there that they won't let me play in, and everything was just fine until Dad pulled this string on the red thing and OH MY GOSH IT WOKE UP AND IT WAS MAD AND WENT ROOOOWWWWWWWRRRRRRR AND ATE ALL THE GRASS AND WOULDN'T STOP AND I HID BEHIND MOM and then Dad rolled it away into the grass and i came out from behind Mom but then DAD PUSHED IT BACK TOWARDS US AND IT WAS SCARY AND I HID BEHIND SOME BRICKS but then Dad pushed it away again and I snuck out and watched and WHAT THE HECK DOES HE KEEP PUSHING IT BACK THIS WAY FOR WHEN IT'S SO MAD but luckily he pushed it away again and I finally laid down in the mulch with my chin on the wall next to Mom for protection and watched until the red monster suddenly stopped ROWRING and Dad took it into the front yard, where it got mad all over again but at least we didn't have to see it thank goodness because it was pretty much the scariest thing I ever saw in my whole entire life.
But the weekend's horrors were not finished quite yet. After dinner, Mom took me outside to go potty which I did because I'm such a good boy. But then she took me upstairs into the secret room where I used to pee until they started keeping the door shut on me. Then Daddy came in and he put me in this giant tub thing and then they sprayed water all over me and then put this smelly foamy stuff all over me and scrubbed me and tried to act like it was so great, and I thought I might leave but Daddy wouldn't let me out and then they sprayed all the foamy stuff off me with MORE water and acted like it was so great even though I was obviously very sad about it. Then they both rubbed me all over with towels until all my hair was standing straight up and then they let me escape and we got on the bed and I was all crazy because WHAT THE HECK! and i bit everything and jumped on everyone and then suddenly fell asleep because this was just the craziest day I ever had in my whole entire life and I pretty much slept the rest of the evening.
Any ideas for revenge will be greatly appreciated.
This has been A Very Disturbing Charlie Report.
April 24, 2009: This is The Charlie Report for Friday, April 24
wif me, Charlie.
It has been a very bitey week here in Falls Church. My teeth hurt and I gots to chew everything to make them feel better, but then Mom and Dad go OOOWWW when I chew them like they don't understand that i'm in PAIN for gudness sake. but they DO give me ice cubes and baby carrots, and those are tasty and feel good, too, but they don't take the place of people-chewing so they better just get used to it is all. i am walking every day and sometimes running with Daddy and meeting lots of people and dogs, which come in all kinds of sizes as it turns out although they all love me because obviously they would have you looked at me?
innyways, I am getting bigger maybe even 10 pounds and i eat all my breakfast and all my dinner now right away, and then i go outside and conduct my business like a big boy, except when i don't. i figured out how to get back under the porch again (by DIGGING!), but Mom says she has a plan to stop me. we'll see how that goes. this weekend Daddy says he and i are going to watch something called the NFL Draft. I hope it's something I can chew on.
Also, it is 27 days until Daddy's mommy comes to join my family of worshippers. I promise to be less bitey by then!
This has been The Charlie Report.
It has been a very bitey week here in Falls Church. My teeth hurt and I gots to chew everything to make them feel better, but then Mom and Dad go OOOWWW when I chew them like they don't understand that i'm in PAIN for gudness sake. but they DO give me ice cubes and baby carrots, and those are tasty and feel good, too, but they don't take the place of people-chewing so they better just get used to it is all. i am walking every day and sometimes running with Daddy and meeting lots of people and dogs, which come in all kinds of sizes as it turns out although they all love me because obviously they would have you looked at me?
innyways, I am getting bigger maybe even 10 pounds and i eat all my breakfast and all my dinner now right away, and then i go outside and conduct my business like a big boy, except when i don't. i figured out how to get back under the porch again (by DIGGING!), but Mom says she has a plan to stop me. we'll see how that goes. this weekend Daddy says he and i are going to watch something called the NFL Draft. I hope it's something I can chew on.
Also, it is 27 days until Daddy's mommy comes to join my family of worshippers. I promise to be less bitey by then!
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 20, 2009: The Charlie Report for Monday, April 20
With me, Charlie.
So this was the most exciting weekend of my whole entire life! On Friday, this tall guy named Trip came to our house and slept all day in one of those secret rooms Mom and Dad don't let me go into, and he was really nice to me and stuff. And he came the next day and the next day, too. When Mom got home, we went on a walk and we met a lady and her dog and her lawnmower, and then we met this man and lady in their front yard, and then we met this guy with two beagles, and then we played in the front yard with our friend Elizabeth and Austin and two other little girls, and then we walked to the park and met a lady and a baby stroller with a baby in it, and then we met this lady with two huge dogs. then we went home and i fell asleep because it was all so exciting.
Then Saturday was my 15 month birthday, and Mom took me for a 2-mile walk, and we met all these people, and they all loved me, and I met more beagles and other dogs, too. AND it turned out there was a neighborhood picnic at the other park with a moonbounce and all these people and about a million little kids, so we went there and everyone loved us and I was the most popular and we even ran into our neighbors there, too, and we got a drink of water and kissed everyone. Then we had to walk all the way home and then Dad came home and started digging this big big hole in the backyard, which was weird. But then guess what, more people came to our house, this Jim guy and Elly lady who were so nice and paid lots of attention to me and said i was cute and played with me. Everything was going really well until they put me in my cave and went out to dinner. But I was brave, and they came back, thank goodness.
Then yesterday my other friends Jean and Jeff came over, and they and Mom and Dad and Jim and Elly put this little wooden box in the big big hole Dad dug, and Mommy cried, and then they covered it up and planted this pretty little tree named Lucy on top, and then I played around it and ate dirt. Jean and Jeff left after that, and later Trip left and Jim and Elly left, and it was just me and Dad and Mom. I really don't understand half of what goes on around here, but it is pretty interesting.
Today it is raining, and I currently am planning on pooping and peeing in the house to avoid having to stand in the rain.
This has been The Charlie Report.
So this was the most exciting weekend of my whole entire life! On Friday, this tall guy named Trip came to our house and slept all day in one of those secret rooms Mom and Dad don't let me go into, and he was really nice to me and stuff. And he came the next day and the next day, too. When Mom got home, we went on a walk and we met a lady and her dog and her lawnmower, and then we met this man and lady in their front yard, and then we met this guy with two beagles, and then we played in the front yard with our friend Elizabeth and Austin and two other little girls, and then we walked to the park and met a lady and a baby stroller with a baby in it, and then we met this lady with two huge dogs. then we went home and i fell asleep because it was all so exciting.
Then Saturday was my 15 month birthday, and Mom took me for a 2-mile walk, and we met all these people, and they all loved me, and I met more beagles and other dogs, too. AND it turned out there was a neighborhood picnic at the other park with a moonbounce and all these people and about a million little kids, so we went there and everyone loved us and I was the most popular and we even ran into our neighbors there, too, and we got a drink of water and kissed everyone. Then we had to walk all the way home and then Dad came home and started digging this big big hole in the backyard, which was weird. But then guess what, more people came to our house, this Jim guy and Elly lady who were so nice and paid lots of attention to me and said i was cute and played with me. Everything was going really well until they put me in my cave and went out to dinner. But I was brave, and they came back, thank goodness.
Then yesterday my other friends Jean and Jeff came over, and they and Mom and Dad and Jim and Elly put this little wooden box in the big big hole Dad dug, and Mommy cried, and then they covered it up and planted this pretty little tree named Lucy on top, and then I played around it and ate dirt. Jean and Jeff left after that, and later Trip left and Jim and Elly left, and it was just me and Dad and Mom. I really don't understand half of what goes on around here, but it is pretty interesting.
Today it is raining, and I currently am planning on pooping and peeing in the house to avoid having to stand in the rain.
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 17, 2009: This is The Charlie Report, for Friday, April 17...
...with me, Charlie.
Yesterday was a very very very exciting day. After days of boring dumb rain, the sun came out again, and I got to run and run and run and run and run and run and run and run and run in the backyard. Daddy took me for a run on the leash, too, and we ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran for a half mile. THEN we came home and Dad thought I would sleep, but instead I played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played. I did have to rest in my cave when Dad went over to his meat-flavored friend Jeff's house. But then he came home, and then Mom came home, and then Mom took me for a walk and we met all these people and a lawnmower and a stroller and two old beagles and one little dog smaller than me and two HUGE big dogs and it was all very exciting. Then we went home and I fell asleep on Mom's lap on the porch because jeez I'm only a baby and that was a pretty big day for me, man! I even fell asleep instead of whining when Mom and Dad ate their dinner.
This has been The Charlie Report.
Yesterday was a very very very exciting day. After days of boring dumb rain, the sun came out again, and I got to run and run and run and run and run and run and run and run and run in the backyard. Daddy took me for a run on the leash, too, and we ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran for a half mile. THEN we came home and Dad thought I would sleep, but instead I played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played and played. I did have to rest in my cave when Dad went over to his meat-flavored friend Jeff's house. But then he came home, and then Mom came home, and then Mom took me for a walk and we met all these people and a lawnmower and a stroller and two old beagles and one little dog smaller than me and two HUGE big dogs and it was all very exciting. Then we went home and I fell asleep on Mom's lap on the porch because jeez I'm only a baby and that was a pretty big day for me, man! I even fell asleep instead of whining when Mom and Dad ate their dinner.
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 14, 2009: This is The Charlie Report for Tuesday, April 14...
...with me, Charlie.
Yesterday Dad took me for a long long walk in the morning, all over the neighborhood. I was very good and stayed at Dad's side and almost never pulled at the leash. Even though we walked for almost a mile, however, I still wanted to play and play when I got home, and only took a short nap. Later, I snuck into the bathroom and pee'ed on the bathmat before Dad could scoop me up and race me outside. Mom came home at that moment and Dad tattled on me. Nevertheless, Mom took me for a second, shorter walk, where we met lots of strangers and a giant dump truck, which was very exciting. Then home again to not pee in the yard. Later, I pee'ed on the newspaper basket in the living room, which now has mysteriously disappeared. I ended the evening by falling asleep on my back in Mom's arms. Then it was up to my crate, where I was put to bed without a whimper (i AM good sometimes).
This morning, I made Dad stand in the rain forever while I did not poop. Then I came in the house and pooped in the living room. Ha ha, I kill myself!
This has been The Charlie Report.
Yesterday Dad took me for a long long walk in the morning, all over the neighborhood. I was very good and stayed at Dad's side and almost never pulled at the leash. Even though we walked for almost a mile, however, I still wanted to play and play when I got home, and only took a short nap. Later, I snuck into the bathroom and pee'ed on the bathmat before Dad could scoop me up and race me outside. Mom came home at that moment and Dad tattled on me. Nevertheless, Mom took me for a second, shorter walk, where we met lots of strangers and a giant dump truck, which was very exciting. Then home again to not pee in the yard. Later, I pee'ed on the newspaper basket in the living room, which now has mysteriously disappeared. I ended the evening by falling asleep on my back in Mom's arms. Then it was up to my crate, where I was put to bed without a whimper (i AM good sometimes).
This morning, I made Dad stand in the rain forever while I did not poop. Then I came in the house and pooped in the living room. Ha ha, I kill myself!
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 13, 2009: Good morning. This is The Charlie Report.
With me, Charlie.
I had a very exciting weekend starting on Friday, when my friends Jean and Jeff brought their giant monster dog Bella (30 pounds!) to visit me in my backyard. She was very large and furry, but I was not afraid and chased her all over the yard, and played, and jumped on her head, and it was lots of fun. Then yesterday Mom and Dad took me out on the leash for a walk that was at least a million billion miles long: we met the family at the entrance to our street, a mom and dad and a little boy and a little girl, and they all pet me and held me and loved on me, and i was very very good because that's the way i roll. then we kept walking the million billion miles (mom says no more than 1/3 to 1/2 mile), then came home, then went in the backyard to pee, then i fell asleep on the porch. then later that Bella came back to my backyard and we played some more. and then after watching some tv, we went to bed and i didn't cry once.
(also I pee'ed in the house three times this weekend, but i blame society.)
This has been The Charlie Report.
I had a very exciting weekend starting on Friday, when my friends Jean and Jeff brought their giant monster dog Bella (30 pounds!) to visit me in my backyard. She was very large and furry, but I was not afraid and chased her all over the yard, and played, and jumped on her head, and it was lots of fun. Then yesterday Mom and Dad took me out on the leash for a walk that was at least a million billion miles long: we met the family at the entrance to our street, a mom and dad and a little boy and a little girl, and they all pet me and held me and loved on me, and i was very very good because that's the way i roll. then we kept walking the million billion miles (mom says no more than 1/3 to 1/2 mile), then came home, then went in the backyard to pee, then i fell asleep on the porch. then later that Bella came back to my backyard and we played some more. and then after watching some tv, we went to bed and i didn't cry once.
(also I pee'ed in the house three times this weekend, but i blame society.)
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 9, 2009: Welcome to the Charlie Report
With me, Tiger Woods!
The Masters begins today, and all eyes will be on me as I play my first major tournament since last year's knee surgery. The excitement surroundin--
CUT THAT OUT!! This is Charlie with the REAL Charlie Report with no Tigers in it because nobody cares about Tigers when there are BEAGLES to look at. I continue to amaze and amuse my new mom and dad with my adorableness. As long as they get me outside at the right time, I am peeing right in The Potty Spot every time. And since they've blocked my entrance under the porch, I'm now pooping close to The Potty Spot, too. It seems to make them very happy. They are very strange that way. Dad has taught me "Sit" and "Down" (as in lie down) in the last two days, and I'm starting to get the hang of "Come," too.
The bad thing for me right now is that my teeth hurt, so I have to chew on lots of things to make them feel better. I heard Mom say my teeth were going to fall out, but I think that's just crazy talk. But then she and Dad are crazy people, as I've mentioned, so it's no surprise really.
I guess in summary, Mom and Dad continue to be smitten with me, and so my plan for complete domination is going as planned.
This has been The Charlie Report.
The Masters begins today, and all eyes will be on me as I play my first major tournament since last year's knee surgery. The excitement surroundin--
CUT THAT OUT!! This is Charlie with the REAL Charlie Report with no Tigers in it because nobody cares about Tigers when there are BEAGLES to look at. I continue to amaze and amuse my new mom and dad with my adorableness. As long as they get me outside at the right time, I am peeing right in The Potty Spot every time. And since they've blocked my entrance under the porch, I'm now pooping close to The Potty Spot, too. It seems to make them very happy. They are very strange that way. Dad has taught me "Sit" and "Down" (as in lie down) in the last two days, and I'm starting to get the hang of "Come," too.
The bad thing for me right now is that my teeth hurt, so I have to chew on lots of things to make them feel better. I heard Mom say my teeth were going to fall out, but I think that's just crazy talk. But then she and Dad are crazy people, as I've mentioned, so it's no surprise really.
I guess in summary, Mom and Dad continue to be smitten with me, and so my plan for complete domination is going as planned.
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 7, 2009: Good morning, this is The Charlie Report
With me, Charlie.
Last night Mom and Dad thrilled to the excitement of my pooping and peeing next to the Magnolia tree and NOT under the porch, both singing "Potty potty potty" while I did my business. I had a very good night: went to bed in my cave without a whimper (after falling asleep on the bed while Mom stroked me). I did wake up in the middle of the night and started to cry and would not be comforted. Mom recognized that this cry sounded different from normal, a little screechy, and guessed that I might have to conduct some business. So Dad took me outside and I pooped AND pee'ed by the Magnolia tree, and Dad sang "Potty potty potty" and then told me I was great. Then I went back to bed in my cave.
Then this morning while Mom was getting ready for work, I told Dad I wanted to go out, and he took me, and I pee'ed in the special spot, and Dad sang "Potty potty potty" and got all excited again. These people are clearly starved for entertainment. Then we went back to bed for a while, and got up at 7am.
Currently, I am asleep on Dad's lap while he watches boring financial news.
This has been The Charlie Report.
Last night Mom and Dad thrilled to the excitement of my pooping and peeing next to the Magnolia tree and NOT under the porch, both singing "Potty potty potty" while I did my business. I had a very good night: went to bed in my cave without a whimper (after falling asleep on the bed while Mom stroked me). I did wake up in the middle of the night and started to cry and would not be comforted. Mom recognized that this cry sounded different from normal, a little screechy, and guessed that I might have to conduct some business. So Dad took me outside and I pooped AND pee'ed by the Magnolia tree, and Dad sang "Potty potty potty" and then told me I was great. Then I went back to bed in my cave.
Then this morning while Mom was getting ready for work, I told Dad I wanted to go out, and he took me, and I pee'ed in the special spot, and Dad sang "Potty potty potty" and got all excited again. These people are clearly starved for entertainment. Then we went back to bed for a while, and got up at 7am.
Currently, I am asleep on Dad's lap while he watches boring financial news.
This has been The Charlie Report.
April 6, 2009: Important Charlie Report UPDATE!
Good morning! This is an important Charlie report update with me, Charlie.
I slept until 7:45 this morning, then went outside and pee'ed in my bathroom spot like a good boy. I didn't poop, though, so Dad took me back inside to feed me. I ate a couple of kibbles, then went directly to the dining room and squatted. Dad rushed me outside, but I refused to finish pooping out there. Dad cleaned up while I chewed on his shoestrings.
I will keep you updated on any further developments. This has been Charlie with a Charlie Report update.
I slept until 7:45 this morning, then went outside and pee'ed in my bathroom spot like a good boy. I didn't poop, though, so Dad took me back inside to feed me. I ate a couple of kibbles, then went directly to the dining room and squatted. Dad rushed me outside, but I refused to finish pooping out there. Dad cleaned up while I chewed on his shoestrings.
I will keep you updated on any further developments. This has been Charlie with a Charlie Report update.
April 6, 2009: Your Morning Charlie Report
Good morning! This is your morning Charlie report with me, Charlie.
I made it through last night without having to go out, waking up only once to cry a little. But Mom dangled her fingers in my cave, which calmed me down so I could go back to sleep. This morning some music played suddenly at around 6am, but stopped quickly. Then Mom seemed to sneak out of the room I think; I was pretty sleepy, so I don't know for sure.
I made it through last night without having to go out, waking up only once to cry a little. But Mom dangled her fingers in my cave, which calmed me down so I could go back to sleep. This morning some music played suddenly at around 6am, but stopped quickly. Then Mom seemed to sneak out of the room I think; I was pretty sleepy, so I don't know for sure.
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